Uncertainty

This poem seeks to describe the uncertainty a woman has within the relationship she is in. She sees the lust in her boyfriend’s eyes, she hears the words come from his lips, and the uncertainty she has of their relationship as she feels he is becoming unfaithful within the choices and actions he is making. The secrets he tries to hide, not understanding that she knows he is looking for someone other than her. Someone that she will never be. He tells her that she is the only one who he sees but in reality the words he says “she’s hot”, the actions he takes “going above and beyond his responsibilities to make this other girl better than what she really is to be” and actions “being in his girlfriend’s car with the other girl alone for a two hour drive” shows differently. She does not completely trust his actions, his obsession of the other girl’s musical abilities where he listens contently to her music over and over for days on end, making note he does not do this with other musicians. Making excuses for the way he feels, making excuses for the type of girl he really wants to be with. She’s tired of trying to make him happy, she’s tired of hearing from other people around him that he is lush and consistently flirting with other women, she’s tired of excuses and she’s tired of all the drama. For any women that is tired, this is for you.

Her brown eyes, brown hair I will never be…
The beauty I have hides deep inside of me…
Lust filled in your eyes, your words are completely lies…
Do you really think I can’t see behind your disguise?

You yearn for things you can’t have…
Never thankful for the things that cross your path…
You say you’re in this for success…
But really you’re a complete mess…
You look only to the things you can see…
Rather than actually living in reality…

I see the passion in your eyes…
Unfortunately I don’t know with whom it lies…
You say you want to be with me…
But all the signs are showing differently…
Am I the one you really want to be with?
Or would you rather that I leave…

I will not be a stand in just filling a partial fantasy…
There is too much at stake for me not to leave…
Make your choice… Make it once…
Will the choice you make, will you make it for us?
My mind filled with doubt, the truth I cannot see…
These visions shall pass, Will you choose me…

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